小猫跳跳跳，小狗叫叫叫，小弟哈哈笑！
Guess who we learnt this from?


None other than ....


..............



.......



*drumrolls*



..............




..........


MR TAY! 
我们学会liao! :D

That's one of the cute songs he learnt in his school long ago, the next time one of you could surprise him by reciting this! 



Yes, it was my turn to visit Uncle Tay with Shengxian and Jeraldine, and witness the legendary Kopi with Butter (x3) for myself. Noteworthy is the amazing speed of the Kopi aunty in bringing his special drink to him before we had even sat down. And another aunty who delivered herbal tea to him and offered to get food for him.
Wah this Uncle Tay, popular guy leh.... ;)

But firstly, for those who are new to Uncle Tay, I dug up this post from the blog (credits to Kaihim)
Uncle Tay's "standard moves" as quoted:

1. Ask if we have eaten.
2. Offer us can drinks.
3. Repeat 1 and 2 indefinitely.
4. Ask if we brought him newspapers.
5. Go drink kopi!

 IT'S ALL TRUE!!!!
 And all these involved him standing and walking about despite his body pains, wanting to make us feel comfortable in his house.

1.5 hours of kopi and chatting (which seemed too fast btw), and there're so many things I'd hold close to my heart and never forget. 

The way Uncle Tay's face lit up (yes, really it's true!) when he suggested that we go drink kopi with him.
How he thanked us many many many times (that's an understatement) throughout the 1.5 hours for bringing him down and accompanying him.
The many things he remember from his childhood! Wartime, what he learnt in school, things he did.
Telling us that he will play the harmonica for us if we get one for him.
Laughing when we asked him to teach us Teochew cos we are noobs at it. 
Saying he is really happy whenever we are there on Saturdays, and that his pains magically disappear LOL.  The big smile when he said that was priceless.
Sharing with us about his sister who can't really visit him anymore because of her legs. There was this sadness and helplessness as he shared this.
His independent demeanour - making sure he has his keys with him at all times, telling us to open his letterbox, and paying for his drink.
Repeatedly rejecting the aunty's offers to help him get his food (hahaha the aunty was so exasperated by that) because he didn't want to trouble her.

And the way he tried to hide his disappointment when it was time for us to leave and he had to go home. Telling us that we must visit him next Saturday. And thanking us profusely again.

We will Because we know how important these Saturdays are to him. 



After a month with THES, I saw the reason that gets each of us up early on Saturday mornings all the way to Geylang Bahru.
Each visit gives us so many lessons that cannot be learnt elsewhere. Uncle Tay's independence despite the many difficulties he faces, his generosity towards us, sincerity, and his easy contentment. I guess we see all these in all the elderly there.

We return week after week not because it's an obligation, but because we really want to.
But why? Why do we want to?
Because They're the ones who've been touching our hearts, over and over again.
And what's the least we could do? Housework for them, listening to them - both sad and happy stories they have, giving our time to them.
That's the least we could do. :)



- LIJIA

I was assigned to visit Mdm Ho today...again! Haha! Mdm Ho seems to be the elderly resident that I have visited for the most number of times ever since the start of my volunteering stint with T.H.E. Seniors. As usual, we did the regular chores--- sweeping, mopping and wiping. But today was rather different because we had a new 'visitor'-- a Bangladeshi door painter. Why do I specially mention him? Well, because I discovered a few things through Mdm Ho's interactions with him. So here goes...

Most of us would more or less know Mdm Ho's 'pattern'. She keeps a close eye on you while you meddle with her stuff with a broom or mop or rag in your hands. AND her supervision doesn't stop at just watching you; she readily gives comments (euphemism intended) when she notices that you are doing things the wrong way (at least in her view). So it's really not surprising to hear her 'scolding' Woon Yong as he worked his way around the house. Hold on a minute... at this time you'd most probably think that I am bullshitting--- Mdm Ho scolding Woon Yong?!?!?! That's not very possible right--- considering that she always sings praises of him and even specifically requested for Woon Yong to visit her.  Haha I will reassure you once more; she does tell him off and she goes all out in doing so. But here's the difference--if you don't know the insider secrets, you'd think that Mdm Ho is being very hard on and unappreciative of what we have done for her. But allow me to offer a new perspective-- this is exactly Mdm Ho's unique way of caring for someone. Yup, you didn't read me wrong. This rationale works the same as the Chinese saying " 打是疼，骂是爱". Still not convinced? Aha...I will offer some concrete evidence here. Remember the door painter? Ok, so now's finally the time to bring him in to our story. Being Mdm Ho, of course she will not give up on the opportunity to interact with people (she has the ability to talk to just about anyone...and I really mean anyone regardless of race, language or religion LOL) So, Mdm Ho had been talking to the door painter intermittently. At first, she asked him about stuff related to the door painting task---will the inner side of the door be painted etc. After the contents of that conversation topic had been fully exhausted, the content of her subsequent conversations with him started to revolve around us, the volunteers.  As and when, Mdm Ho will tell the door painter that we 'come over every Sunday (actually it's Saturday, but that's not really important haha) to help out..we clean everything..we receive no pay..' She repeated this for about 5-6 times (I'm serious), just like how she always praises the alumnus Ah Hua for coming to help and how he's now a successful lecturer earning huge bucks every month $.$ So you get my point. Mdm Ho may 'criticise' our clumsiness at doing housework but she means no harm. In fact, if she doesn't say anything at all, it'll be really boring, wouldn't it? That's all part of the joy of volunteering :) And to add on, while I was performing the stunt of dusting the top surface of Mdm Ho's wardrobe, she looked rather worried-- like I may fall off the chair that I was standing on anytime. She kept asking me '可以吗？’ and said that there's no need to do a very thorough cleaning up there. So there... it's really not hard to spot Mdm Ho's 关怀方式.

My point is that T.H.E. Seniors is really a good place to see the good in others. For me, I choose to believe that everyone is kind by nature. And a kind heart is exactly beauty in its own right.

Shuqin :)

How blessed we all are

CSC visiting reflections Moon cake festival visit

Mdm Ho

She appeared as cheery and cute as always. She reported having backache. We helped to do some housework for her and chat with her.  She is generally in a good emotional state. We gave her a lantern and a moon cake. She said words of thanks to CSC and wishes CSC a happy birthday.

Mdm Lim

I heard this is the first time ever that any volunteer visited her. She speaks hokkien. She is friendly and engages with us. We gave her a lantern, a moon cake and played some oldie on the phone for her to listen to. She wished CSC volunteers good health for CSC’s birthday.  She shared with us about the past and said that she has been suffering from back problems since a few years back and she is unable to lie down for a proper rest since then. She appears to be chatty, smiling and joking a lot. However, she did point out that she is actually generally unhappy with life. She looked like she was about to cry when she said that. She commented that it is difficult to be happy although she tries and that she is just putting up a false happy front because of guests. I guess we should make more effort to engage her and make her feel that there are cute kids who care. Oh. And she only drinks a particular brand of instant coffee, everyday.

13 OCTOBER visit :)

Mdm Ho

Did housework for her and chat with her. She appears to be happy to have our company and enjoy our visits She did, although, have a slight complain about her back pains (I think it got worse) and showed poor appetite (maybe it was also because the rice was too hard, according to her).  Based on observation, she looks tired. Generally still in a happy state.

Mr Chiu

A lesson drawn: CHECK THE EXPIRY DATES OF THE FOOD THEY KEEP!

To our horror, we found that he keeps a lot of expired food in the fridge and on the table. So we checked and discarded those expired food for him, did some housework and chat with him. He drinks; I think 5 cups of coffee every day? He can recite chim poems in Cantonese. He is friendly and jovial.

I look forward to every visit because I see things from a perspective I never ever had. It makes you feel a sense of shame, and makes you wonder why you haven't realised how blessed you actually are.



- Gillian

1 million lessons from 2 visits

I missed visits for the past 2 weeks due to the service-learning workshop conducted by TOUCH Leadership & Mentoring. So to be honest, while I was feeling excited to be able to finally go for visit today, there was a little bit of inertia about travelling. But as it turns out, unsurprisingly, it's all so worth it.

Today was yet yet yet another super heartfelt visit for me. We went to Mdm Ho's first, where we met engwee and ah hua (two of our v dedicated T.H.E.S. alumni). I don't know how this weekly routine of housework felt so special today... I swept the floor until very SHIOK, as if I haven't swept the floor in my entire life. I think I just miss this feeling of squeezing in a small unit w my fellow T.H.E.S. volunteers, all buried in house work just for one purpose - to keep the place clean and conducive for our seniors. It's this feeling! That makes me fall in love w T.H.E.S. once again - really. :)

After a while, we sat down and dug out Chinese chess to play! Wee! I must admit I didn't focus on the game... For I was overwhelmed by this happiness in my heart, and maybe also this peace from the slowing down of pace. At that moment, I was truly enjoying myself as a volunteer. 

We visited Mr Tay next, where... YES! I finally got to accompany him down for his legendary coffee trip! (Yes, it's my first time!!!) :D I ordered a cup of coffee w butterrr too ~ Woolalaa! And I got what yingcong meant when he shared w us how rich Mr Tay's expression was when he took his sips of coffee. It was PRECIOUS, that SMILE. Today I learnt that it's not only this cup of coffee that he has been waiting for 1 week (7 days, 168 hours, 10080 minutes) - it's also this company, this wind and this coffeeshop noise. It's to be able to step out of his house and take a breather. (In fact, right after he opened his door for us, he went to dress up in his smart long sleeve shirt and long pants w belt already!) :) 

In his sharing about cooping in the house 24hrs a day, either sleeping or sitting or thinking, I could feel his frustration and loneliness. What adds on to this, is definitely his lack of eyesight which he can't possible ignore. While we sometimes focus on our own performance about what to say next to make our senior feel better whenever he shares about his depressed feelings, I thought we could also think from his perspective... I can totally imagine myself being even more frustrated and down. 

But then, that's where we come in! :D We're here to bring to light their own powers, which our lovely seniors tend to forget because they get stuck in the dim thoughts of being "old and useless", "waiting for death", etc. Besides ALLOWING him to share about his depressed thoughts, we talked about HAPPY THINGS! Just now Kaisheng asked Mr Tay about what he did when he was younger. He shared about how he peed into his Principal's coffee!!!!! Amidst his words, I saw mischief written all over his face even by recalling his naughty acts from 7 decades ago. It really melted my heart. I believe strongly in being childish, regardless of your age! :D 

We decided to treat Mr Tay to a meal (woonyong paid though. Oops!), but got rejected. From what I observed, Mr Tay is an individual w strong dignity and principles. He does not want to owe people - either tangibly or intangibly. And I guess as volunteers we should learn to RESPECT THEIR OPINIONS too! Or else we may end up making them feel damn bad, or worst still, making them feel like we PITY them. We don't want that to happen. 

On a side note, Mr Tay also shared about how he managed to quit smoking. He said it's all psychological (fyi, he smoked one pack a day for 40 over years, but as of now he has stopped for about a year). He reminded us that for everything we do, we should do w our HEARTS. 

Coming to an end, I would like to share about INDEPENDENCE. On our way back, woonyong went to open the door for Mr Tay while I supported Mr Tay. With one hand held to mine, his other hand was searching for the wall. I brought him to the wall and intentionally let go my hand w his permission - and of cos to continue looking at him and making sure it's safe. As volunteers, we've to trust that the seniors have ability to independent. Furthermore we can't be there to hold them everywhere 24/7. So I felt it was important on our part to allow them to take care of themselves. (I'm not saying we don't support our seniors at all. But in circumstances whereby they could use their environmental settings to support themselves, we should allow that to happen). 

Finally, I shall conclude w this: 
Don't see our seniors in the light of the needy. They're our TEACHERS because they're filled w vast experiences of life, which we can definitely learn from! :)

Lots of love, 
Jocelyn

Good Morning!

How are you? Having backache? Insomnia last night? What we experience are just short moments of our life. However, when we age these nightmare will haunt us every night. 

Today was the day that everyone look forward for both volunteers and seniors. A short two hour thing is something that we all can do to change one live. It is my first visit for Mr Tay and as usual my regular visit to Mdm Ho.

First we went to Mdm Ho's house. When we went in Mdm Ho look so happy. Why? Anyone can make a guess?..... The legendary visitor (Ah Hua) came. My first time meeting him! I wonder if I can make such commitments like him next time? I believe this will be the test for us to REDISCOVER our purpose of volunteering.

This is the first time, for me, Mdm Ho changing her curtains. It is quite a difficult task if you do not have the skills and patience. However, of course, all of us do! yay! =D 

Changing Curtains

Jocelyn first try with curtain pins

While finding more curtain pins this is what i found... Pretty right?

Shortly after every thing is done Ah hua and Ah Lim went over to Mdm Cheong's House (as instructed, if you know what I mean haha). As there is still time, we stayed with Mdm Ho to chit chat again. I believe that due to visiting Mdm Ho every week, the topic differs from the first few visits. Historical stories no longer fills the air, instead we were talking about the moments that we share! The memorable moments that Kaisheng (:P) has given, the joy that all volunteers gave, lots of interesting moments! I believe this is the power of touching one's life. Agree?

After some moment, a bit random, Mdm Ho ask if we want to play "DUM" (chess in general). At first, I thought was a game called "DUM", the red and black chess, and wanted to play with Mdm Ho. In the end, it was chinese chess! LOL (Play chinese chess!). As it is hard to play chess with Mdm Ho, and cannot reject her kind offer, we played for her to see. It was Team Felicia VS Team Jocelyn + me, as felicia say she knows how to play. As felicia is better, Mdm Ho was our adviser! We enjoyed the game!

Felicia thinking hard!

Guess who won?

Next up...my first visit to Mr Tay's house!!
Today as we went a bit later then usual, Mr Tay was asleep when we arrive. However, when we call for him, something really touch me! He open the door with a big smile!! He said "I am so happy to hear that you came, I thought I need to wait for another week." Once again, a second touch for today!

When I went in his home, I was like WOW!!! Though being visually impaired but yet this house is neat and tidy! As per norm, he offered drinks and bread to us, and then he quickly change into his neat clothes and ....ready to go!

No Butter, 1 butter and 3 butter (top)!

The lim-kopi session was so exciting as it was the first time i try coffee with butter (but 1 slice). The taste was not as bad as i thought, in actual fact, I quite like it, thinking of upgrading to 2 or 3 slices on the next visit.

Hearing much about him, made Jocelyn and I very curious that we never stop popping questions about Mr Tay's stories. He was so happy to share his whole life experience. In between he taught us a lot of his life lessons and advise us not to take his path. We should not blind ourselves with things that we will repent for life later.

Lim-Kopi!!

Jocelyn having his first session with Mr Tay!

Stories behind a cup of butter-ed coffee

There were many touching moments just during a short coffee session. One cup of coffee to bring you through 80+ years of stories! <3 all="all" for="for" forward="forward" look="look" next="next" p="p" s="s" that="that" to="to" today="today" week="week">

Woon Yong

Words said

(raw translation)

UNCLE LIM:

"Don't need to help me to sweep! Don't need to help me to clean, I already cleaned. It's okay! You all sit down lah."

"Us old people are actually very lucky. You see, we have 触爱 and you students helping us, we are very fortunate."

"老了就没用了。"
BUT...
"I always help out at the centre whenever I'm free. I'm not sick, I still can do what I can. They give us so much and so we should do what we can too."

"The welfare services say they want to send someone to help me clean the house every Saturday."
Us: "uh... Which means they will be here when we are here?"
"Then you all don't need to clean mah!"
"Huh..... But we still want to come and see you leh!"
- & Uncle Lim gives a what-are-you-thinking laugh O.o - 
"If you want to come, OF COURSE i welcome you lah! Why? You all want to make friends with me, why would I not want?!"



UNCLE LEE:

"Look at all my godsons and goddaughters..." *introduces them excitedly from the photos on his famous wall*

"Wah, that time I took part in a play with some sec school students. They all called me Papa, I hear already SIBEH SHIOK ah!"

"我是一个很念旧的人，see I still keep this muffin they gave me for my Birthday. (all of us jaw-dropped) really cannot bear to eat leh! I will throw it away when a new one comes in next year! ;)"
(hint hint? hahaha)


AUNTY TAN:

"I make tea using these tea leaves every day. Very bitter!!"
*holds out tea leaves to one of us* "YOU WANT TO TRY?!"
Hahaha and she laughed heartily when we said nononono. D:

(pardon the lack of chatterlog for Aunty Tan because I had to leave)


--
Why a chatterlog for my first blogpost here?
Because we can only begin to help when we begin to listen. These are small snippets of conversation from my first two visits to these seniors.

It was my first time doing house visits and all of the elderly were cheerful people who welcomed and thanked us profusely each time we went.
But it's only after much chatting that they begin to share their stories with you, and let you in. And you sort of have a glimpse - however brief - at the possible sadness behind the smiles.

They cherish so many little things that we, more often than not, take for granted. We definitely live in much better conditions, and have more friends & family than them. But I guess I could safely say a majority of us grumble & complain more about life than them.
Contentment with small gifts (recall the half-year-old muffin), with little bits of help given, with simply a place to stay in and food to eat.


There's a reason why we're doing this though our visits are purely to help them with housework, understand and spend time with them - not raising funds, not donations.
But it's always the time you've taken out, and the company you've given, that will leave a mark, that will make that difference to them.

Anyway they are so cute you won't want to stop visiting them once you've begun! :D 

- LI JIA

13 Oct Visit:)

My group (Swee Fen, Jeremy, Chaur Ann, Kok Seng, Ee Hui) and I visited Mr Lee and Mdm Cheong yesterday:) I was quite lucky as both of the elderly that we visited could speak Chinese so I could understand what they were saying:)

We went to visit Mr Lee first and once we reached his house, he showed us all the photos that were pasted on his wall. They formed the words "触爱" which stands for TOUCH. Mr Lee took his cane and pointed to each photo, telling us who he took it with and where he took it at. It felt like he was the teacher giving us a lesson as we stood around listening to him and I could tell that he was enjoying himself:) He also asked us to take photo with him so that he could replace those photos of himself with the photos he took with us:) So each of us took an individual shot with him before we took a group shot:) Halfway through the visit, Mr Lee suddenly said that he forgot to offer us drinks and quickly took out packets of drinks from the refrigerator. We quickly told him that we weren't thirsty but Mr Lee said that he went to buy those drinks for us on friday as he knew we were coming the next day and so we accepted the drinks. However, we told him not to spend money on us again the next time. The elderly are really very nice to us, always buying drinks for us even though they don't have much money to spend on themselves. From this, we can also see how much they look forward to us visiting them every Saturday as they will even prepare for the visit beforehand.

Mr Lee also told us about all those major outings that he went to and I can tell that he looks forward to the next one as he asked us where we planned to go. His enthusiasm makes me very excited for the next major outing too!!:)

Next, we visited Mdm Cheong:) We helped her to clean up her house before we sat down to chat with her:) There wasn't much for us to do as her house is actually quite clean. Mdm Cheong had to think for a while to see what some of us can do because she said they were too many of us that day! I think it was just so funny when she said she wanted to check whether the windows were really clean after we cleaned it and she even called herself the boss!:) After chatting with her for a while, it was time for us to go.

Time really passes very quickly when I visit the seniors. I always feel very bad when we have to tell them that it was time for us to leave. Somehow, I could feel that they were also quite sad when we had to leave although they always say goodbye to us with a smile. I feel that every visit is just so short and I think that these elderly feel the same way too:(

I felt that the two seniors that I visited yesterday were really cheerful! It felt really different as compared to my previous few visits. According to the other groups, the seniors that they visited seemed quite happy as well! I'm just so glad to see the seniors being happy:) I felt very happy after yesterday's visit and I just feel that each visit just gets better and better for me:)

Joscelin:)

13 Oct Visitation - Mr Lin/Mdm Tan

           Today is my third visit since I first joined T.H.E. Seniors early this semester. For the first two visits, I had been assigned to visit Mdm Ho whose house does not require much of an effort to clean. Today, I had two new elderly residents to visit for the first time-- Mr Lin and Mdm Tan. Compared to Mdm Ho's house, Mr Lin's house requires much much more cleaning-- even the sink (I've never imagined that a sink will be a significant thing to clean) was in a bad state as thick lumps of dirt stuck stubbornly to the sides of the sink as well as to the drainage hole (where a few ants also happened to be crawling around). At the same time, an all-pervasive pungent smell permeated the entire house, making it hard to breathe... Nevertheless, I think that this experience is a very fulfilling one as it taught me to be tolerant and really be grateful for what I have-- a clean living environment and of course, my family members who shower me with care and concern. For the elderly residents, they have no one who is by their side 24/7 to help them along with life. All the loneliness and debilitating illnesses are too much to bear, yet they have no choice but to cope with what life throws at them.
          Going back to the part on cleaning, I realised that sometimes things in life may not be what they seem; there's always a learning point in each and every thing that happens in life. No doubt the house may be dirty and smelly, and by all means we can grumble about the state of things, but by doing this, what do we really gain from it? We are merely doing injustice to ourselves by denying ourselves the chance to learn and to see things in a better light. Why not change the way we think-- precisely because the house is dirty, I was then given the chance to be of use and help someone clean up his/her house such that he/she has a much better living environment, which incidentally is what everyone would love to have. Nobody would want to live in a filthy place if they have the option of a cleaner living environment. Thus while I am still young and able-bodied, I am actually able to be of help and make a difference in someone's life. By thinking this way, a lot of seemingly 'arduous' tasks become something delightful. At the same time, I also feel much happier while volunteering my service.
         In essence, I think I've learnt a lot today even though it was just a short two hours plus volunteering experience. I am really touched to see how a lot of us turned up to volunteer our service despite it being the peak period of the semester now--with all the projects and assignments becoming due and making us mad as hatters. It's really heartwarming to see the kindness that exudes from all those around me. I think it's something that's so hard to come by nowadays and I am really grateful to be surrounded by great people like y'all:)
-Shuqin

13 oct visit

Hi, Kai Him here and today, 13th October 2012 it was my second time volunteering with you guys. Today my group (Yi An, Louise, Valerie, Clement) and I went to visit Mr Tay and Mdm Cheng. Mdm Cheng is a new addition to the elderly that we visit.

I visited Mr Tay on the last visit as well, and I felt that he was much happier today! As usual, we went to his place and he will do his standard moves:

1. Ask if we have eaten.
2. Offer us can drinks.
3. Repeat 1 and 2 indefinitely.
4. Ask if we brought him newspapers.
5. Go drink kopi!

So as per usuals we brought him to drink kopi + butter. Having tried this drink last time round already, I decided not to join in this time as I didnt want caffeine today. As I was terrible at hokkien, I always had difficulty talking to him, and even listening. I could probably catch 20% at most, and many times I want to open my mouth but nothing comes out, except maybe jia ba liao. Today, he was more mischievous and told us his childhood story, when he erm, pee-ed into his principal's coffee mug and happily watched him drink it! We were quite stunned yet amused by that. He also told us that he had many female friends, but they only went out but he did not bring them home. And when we mentioned about his teeth being yellow he suddenly shocked us by removing his dentures slightly and moving them around, shaking in his mouth!!! Scared us, but extremely adorable Mr Tay is (:


Mdm Cheng lives further away and we had to walk a bit. Mdm Cheng is fluent in mandarin, cantonese and probably hokkien too! She told us she learnt mandarin from watching TV! She is wheelchair bound and stays indoors mostly, except when her friend comes around to bring her to the hawker center for food. I would believe that if we visit her the next time we can try our best to bring her down too. She said that her house is quite clean and I think our volunteers can just help out with a little bit of housework the next time round. Clean the windows or something. She rents a room out as well. I think the important part is that we talk to her. She says it herself that she is very lonely after her husband departed from this world a few years back. As she mentioned about her husband, she could not control her emotions and tears began to well up in her red swollen eyes. I didnt know what to do or say but at the point of time, I understood her. She just wanted company, and whoever saw this scene would surely want to be her friend. I want to be back for her.


And as usual, the comm will be asking for people to blog about the visit after the day, and once again most people were reluctant or hesitant about doing it. Me too. I wasn't passionate enough to raise my hand and say I will do that. I guess we are all lazy to do so, or too busy in our own opinion? But as my group and I were trying to play a game to decide who shall do the blogging, I suddenly saw how wrong this was, and i felt bad, maybe even disgusted by myself. Blogging about the visit should not be a punishment, for the loser of the game to settle it. And so, I said I would volunteer to do so, and hoped the rest would volunteer once in a while in the following weeks.

For me, I feel that it is really not so much important how much you write or what you write, but to give you a chance to type things out and rethink of the significance and effect the visits might have on you. It is especially useful for the new volunteers like me, as this gives us a good chance to look back and to find and explore further insights and feelings and thoughts that we might not discover had we not reviewed it. I hope we can all give it a chance and who knows? We might discover something new about ourselves that we never knew existed.

Lastly, if you are still reading this, I would like to say that I had been very impressed by the energy, the vibe and positivity that many of you guys possess. And I'm truly grateful for that. Be it the older experienced volunteers, the newer ones or even the elderly, I have enjoyed the energy from you guys totally. Positivity is very contagious and I feel that we should all keep it up, as we interact with each other and with the elderly, this energy can spread or even go a long way to making someone's day, just as you guys have made mine.

Saturday mornings, catching up with friends, with elderly, befriending new ones. Life is awesome, isn't it. (:

               Today my group comprising of Darren, Kah Suan, Lu Ting and me visited Mdm Chow Moi and Mdm Lim. It's been a long time since I last visited them if I didnt remember wrongly haha...

               Initially we went to Mdm Lim's unit but she wasnt in hence we went to visit Mdm Chow Moi first. As usual Mdm Chow Moi invited us with smile and laughter still as cheerful as before : ). We wanted to do household chores but she insisted to just chit chat with her instead. And then the conversation starts... with both Kah Suan and Lu Ting struggling to initiate chat with Mdm Chow Moi as their Hokkien also cmi like me. Darren and I will intervene during some intervals when they are really stucked. Overall I guess they were having fun trying to converse in Hokkien ,with Lu Ting exceptionally noob in her Hokkien Dialect.
               After bidding goodbye to Mdm Chow Moi, we went to visit Mdm Lim. On the way to her house. we happened to bump into her at the void deck. We wanted to help her with household chores but she insisted in staying at the void deck to 乘凉. She mentioned that cooping alone whole day at home is stuffy and that will make her 神经错乱. Errmm.. and both Kah Suan and Lu Ting started their conversation with her again. And yea both of them still struggled with grasping Hokkien well and Kah Suan even went to the extent of wanting to converse with the rest of the seniors sitting around. -__-" She's too passionate and that's a good thing to compliment on !!
              Tad's all for today's sharing thx alot : )

Cheers,
Shawn

Reflections of a first-time volunteer

(naggy long-winded year 4 student alert)

Hi, I'm Kai Him and I first volunteered with T.H.E.seniors in Jan 2012 at the visit to botanical gardens. It was just a once off event but i thoroughly enjoyed myself that day, with the exteremely adorable group of aunties and uncles that I interacted with that day. I especially loved one or two of the most passionate aunties that really made my day, I felt a connection there as though I was her grandson or something. Just when i was supposed to be the one to make their day, they made mine. Perhaps this is the way that it should be, isn't it? I couldnt bear to leave them at the end of the day and seeing some of the photos we took that day on fb, I really missed them.

Then I thought, I want to see them again! or have a chance to interact with other elderly as well. Thus, I came to the orientation visit session on 29 september when jocelyn invited me. And that was my first day. Later on jocelyn sent me an sms for me to reflect upon some issues and I felt it was a brilliant idea. That led me to many other insights and I would like to just share a little with you all now.

I said that day, of my first visit:

"I don't really feel very accomplished but I was very happy to feel the positive energy from the volunteers and also how some of the older volunteers were able to click with the elderly better. I guess it takes time to get used to interacting with a different generation all together. I think I can be influenced easily by this kinda energy and enthusiasm so I was glad to be around today.

It was a good experience overall. I was with mdm tan and mr tay, who were living in very good conditions actually (than I expected and I was happy to see that). esp for mr tay who couldnt see but managed to keep his place so tidy and clean!! it was a bit sad to hear some of their problems, with health, kids, money etc. I used to think that people who can help should help those most deeply in need of help, donate money, take care of them etc. but recently I have had new thoughts, that I'm glad to see people helping out the other ppl who are not the least priviledged but still have their own problems because I believe we can make a difference to them too. like how mr tay was saying he is tight on budgets but I feel that giving him company is no less or even more impt than helping him with his cash problems. they were like very thankful for us as well, but its sad that I didnt deserve much of that because I didnt help much at all. and I wished I could be of greater help.

I tried the coffee + butter that mr tay drinks everytime! he wants three slices but I tried with one only. haha I could not really appreciate the diff between that and normal kopi but it was quite memorable, never knew such a thing existed.

Both elderly speaks only hokkien and I had difficulty, because I couldnt understand. probably catch only 10-20% sigh. maybe it will be better for me to visit a cantonese speaking elderly instead! so the language barrier was very big and I couldnt really listen and reply. many times I feel so handicapped cos I have much to say or ask or wanna hear but I cant do so. had to rely on the two older volunteers who spoke hokkien.

Overall I am very happy to meet new people, be it elderly or volunteers, who had a positive vibe and energy that I felt strongly today. "

A day filled with HAPPINESS :)

Hello people,

Are you missing all the seniors you visit last week? Let me share with you the stories and reflections for the visit today.

Today, we visited Mdm Cheong and Mdm Ho.

Writing her name 
with reference :)

Firstly, we visited Mdm Cheong. She is free today for our visit as she is down with a flu. As usual we did the normal household chores  like cleaning the windows, toilet, and mopping of floor. As she was sick and feeling hot (warm afternoon), she sat in front of 2 fans throughout the visit.

After doing all the instructed (you know what i mean if you have been there) chores, we sat down to chat with her. Some topics throughout the visit were the mid-Autumn festival celebration she attended last week, how she record events on calendar, her medication given etc. Yi An has engage her in a small activity of writing her name, as all elderly kept on saying they are uneducated, it is actually a challenge for them. Have you ever seen before people writing "_"? yup, mdm cheong wrote her name with underscores, so ingenious right?

Well Done!! Feel so proud!

We have a great time interacting with Mdm Cheong especially when we joke around. There are too many too share it right here, so do look forward to visit her on you next visit!! Okay, I will share 2 of the highlights for the visit.

Joke 1:
Mdm Cheong said: 别人睡觉，我天天都没有睡觉。
Literally, what we understood was Mdm Cheong, unlike others, does not sleep. The first reaction was "HUH??". When we ask her why didn't she sleep, she laughed and replied that it was not my habit. After that we realized that she meant that she does not take afternoon nap like others who sleeps after lunch. "Ohhh...." She explain that resting is sufficient for her and she does not need any nap. Visit her to find out how she take a rest :)

Want to know how I usually rest?

Joke 2:
Q:  Why are you so good in cleaning the floor? Did you like do it frequently? Do you help your parent?
A: Because I am majoring in mopping in the university!

We love to chat!

Next up, is our No. 50 senior Mdm Ho. Why No. 50? (It is for me to know and for you to find out!)

When we visited her, she was taking a nap. She immediately woke up to welcome us.

Chun Hai immediately initiated to sweep and clean the floor. His enthusiasm is admirable. However, today he fall into Mdm Ho's trap! Mdm Ho laughed and smile at him to ask him to stop. Why? 

Because prior to the visit, I went to Mdm Ho's house to facilitate and help her out. Before I left to meet up with the others she told me this: "Don't inform the others! Lets test their reaction." A little joke to bright up our boring day, why not? Deal!

As usual, we sat down to speak to her about everything that she has experience before. As I interact with her this time, it felt so different. The layer of wall between us on the first visit has vanished. She love to share many stories, and we like to joke with her. She really has the sense of humour!

Mdm Ho's Drink!

She is always very hospitable and offer us with her drinks! Thank you!




That is all for today. It is time for REFLECTION!

Q1: Why did I join T.H.E. Seniors?

What we have today was built by people from the past. Who are they? The seniors of course. As we move on towards goals of our lives, we should not abandon and forget about those who had work for our present. They helped us to shape our current society. That is one of the motivations that drives me to go. Our simple presents bring lots of happiness to them. Although we cannot take away their pain from their deteriorating body, neither we can change their past, we still can help them with things we could at the present!

Q2: Why are we there?

The answer varies between people. Do you treat it as a job? Do you treat it as an event to attend?

My answer is none of the above. I am there as it is part of me. I am not there because I must be there. I am not there because it is my duty. I simply like to be there every Saturday if I am able. I really enjoy the smiles of elderly and the moment they share with me. I always believe that they can feel your heart if you really put it in in the first place. Your presence is not important, but your heart is. Many senior always mention many other volunteers that are no longer visiting them, due to the hectic working life after graduate. I can feel it when they start to recognize me after just a few visit!

Alright, that is what I have learned from today's visit! Hope to see others next week!

Woon Yong :)

29 Sept: Visits to Mdm Tan & Mr Tay :)

On 29^th September, I attended my second visit and, like many others, I was excited to meet and celebrate MAF with the elderly and my new friends (Kai Sheng, Kai Him, Yun Yin, Camy and Shu Rui).

We first sought respite from the scorching sun at Mdm Tan’s house. It was brightly lit by natural light, had good ventilation and smelt rather fresh. Mdm Tan proudly told us that she had completed some cleaning prior to our visit, and thus we didn’t need to do so. I was quick to agree. However, the observant Camy noted that there were random ‘stuffs’ on the floor and that prompted us to sweep and mop the house once more, despite Mdm Tan’s short-lived protest. All this while, I was particularly worried that she would try to walk around while the floor was still wet. It was a good thing that she didn’t, phewww.

Following which, we informed Mdm Tan about the upcoming CSC’s birthday, and asked if we could take a photograph with her along with a piece of paper stating her well wishes for CSC. Initially, she seemed slightly reserved and, perhaps, a little shy. She insisted that her eyesight was poor and that she didn’t know what to write. In the end, she said that she was (and still is) very thankful for CSC because without it, she wouldn’t have met us. She was really grateful for us, and I could sense this through all her cute smiles and appreciative nods.

After an enjoyable phototaking session, everyone gathered around Mdm Tan and enquired about her day. She said that she was fine and happy, but her eyes seemed to tell a different story. At Camy’s prodding, Mdm Tan finally revealed that she was worried about her son who has kidney problems and is currently in the hospital. Due to my limited Hokkien, I could only guess that she feels hindered by her old age and poor eyesight, and her inability to provide as much support to her son as she wants to. When she hinted that she felt useless, something really tugged at my heartstrings. She seemed so helpless, so vulnerable, in a world that she could barely see or comprehend. I was suddenly reminded of my own grandmothers, and wished that I could do so much more for her too.

As much as I wanted to stay on, we were running late for our date with Mr Tay. Thus, Kai Sheng, Kai Him and I headed for Mr Tay’s apartment first while the rest stayed on. To be honest, I got a shock when he finally opened the door. He wasn’t wearing a shirt, and that revealed his frail body which he later complained to be hurting all over. I didn’t expect him to be so frail and skinny; I had envisioned a uncle with slight pot belly, or at least with a bit more flab. Despite his “bone-deep” pains, he greeted us happily and warmly invited us into his house to have a drink. His house was almost pitch-dark and stuffy, a stark contrast from Mdm Tay’s. It was then that I learnt that Mr Tay is blind. He then showed us a watch and asked if it’s still working.  Yes it is, said Kai Sheng. As Mr Tay carefully placed the watch back into its original cupboard, I thought that I saw him giving a weak smile. The watch probably has some sentimental value to him.

Mr Tay then got dressed in a smart-looking shirt with rolled-up sleeves, fumbled a little for his keys and wallet, and happily got out of his house for his weekly- or biweekly- coffee treat. He revealed that he usually leaves his house only when he is accompanied by our volunteers; on other days, he’s stuck at home, alone. He mentioned that his sister used to visit him, but now she doesn’t do so anymore because “something happened to her legs”. I could only guess that she had a bad fall earlier. I’ve always been used to walking fast but that day, I learnt how to slow down my pace for others. It wasn’t a long walk from Mr Tay’s house to the coffee shop, but it was quite tiring for Mr Tay given his reduced stamina and horrible pains. It was really heartening to see the two guys flanking and supporting Mr Tay throughout.

At the coffee shop, we helped Mr Tay order his favourite cup of coffee with 3 slides of butter. He passed us a ten-dollar bill, which Kai Sheng exchanged for five 2-dollar bills and returned them to Mr Tay. In other words, Kai Sheng secretly treated Mr Tay to a cup of coffee! I want to do the same next time I visit Mr Tay again. J Kai Him, feeling adventurous, wanted to try the same coffee with 3 slides of butter too, but was somehow persuaded out of it by the auntie taking the orders. He eventually settled for coffee with one slice of butter, to which he proclaimed as “not bad” and “smooth”.

Initially, Mr Tay looked happy while he ate the mooncake and drank his coffee. After we informed him that his latest phone bill was only a few cents, he hinted that he has no one to call. He doesn’t call his aforementioned sister too, because “there is no point”. I wanted to ask why, but I couldn’t find the words… Mr Tay then emphasised his blindness, and felt that “one is useless when one can no longer see.” He then stopped eating or drinking, and sat there quietly with so much sadness in his eyes that I thought he was about to cry. He didn’t. All this while, Kai Sheng had been gently patting Mr Tay on the back to tell him that everything’s ok and that we’re all here for him. By reaching out to Mr Tay like this, Kai Sheng is able to transcend all the barriers that may have existed between him and Mr Tay, and provide him with some comfort. This is another memorable takeaway for me.

Woah I didn’t know that I would take so long to reflect on the day’s event and to write this blog post. This proves that there were so many things that I didn’t know about the elderly and myself prior to the visit, and I’m really glad and thankful for all the lessons- be they big or small- that I’ve learnt on that day. This may sound a little cliché, but the brief encounters with Mdm Tan and Mr Tay really taught me the importance of looking beyond what’s obvious. The elderly may sometimes hide behind a façade and act like they are cheerful when, in fact, they are not. They do so because of various reasons, but I think that it’s mainly because they are afraid of ‘bothering’, ‘troubling’ or ‘hurting’ their family members or people who mean something to them, like us. I can’t help but to think of how silly but selflessly noble they are.

Now I finally understand why the seniors say that “every visit is a new visit”.  I’m certainly looking forward to my next visit J

Love, Jennifer.

Clockwise from left: Camy, Shu Rui, Me, Yun Yin, Kai Sheng.

Credits to Kai Him who took this pic for us and thus couldn't be in it :P

HELLO EVERYBODY!

For the last visit, my group consisted of Woon Yong, Kah Suan, Bright, Swee Fen and myself.
We were assigned to visit Mdm Chow Moi and Mdm Cheong. Alot of people have been saying that Mdm Chow Moi was quite emotional for the past few visits but since I did not have the chance to visit her, I was wondering what caused her to be unhappy and hoping that she had cheered up this week. Indeed she seemed quite happy when she saw us. We gave her the latern and mooncake and she was staring intently when Woon Yong was drawing the CSC birthday card. When we ask her to colour the picture, she keep refusing at first, saying that she is illiterate. And she said illiterate people like her will look at a lunatic when she colour the picture. But we constantly tell her that why do you need to be literate to colour? And we told her to believe in herself when she keep saying her colouring is not nice. The picture turned out to be very nice. I feel that elderly also need constant encouragement  To tell them that they can do it and they are definitely not useless. We also sang for her=) When I ask her if she recognise me she says she does. I was glad she did because rather than being a volunteer, I hope to make her feel like we are her "friends". She may seem like a carefree elderly but I am sure she has her worries. So I try to sound her out as to why she was unhappy by asking about her health. But she said her health was ok so I didn't probe on. I apologised for not being able to visit her as often as I would like to and she told me,"Bueh yao kin. Wu eng jia lai." and gave me a smile. People are always good at consoling others but not themselves.

Next we went to visit Mdm Cheong but because she was leaving home soon she asked us to visit her next time. So we only left the mooncake and latern behind. So we went to Mdm Ho's house instead. The group there was already cleaning her house so we didn't help much. After the group has finished cleaning, we sat down and listen to Mdm Ho talk about how she acquire her multi-lingual ability last time. My group got abit too caught up talking among ourselves and thanks Chun Hai for the reminder. Elderly shoould be our priority during visits.SORRY MDM HO! We wouldn't like it when others are distracted when we are talking as well.

Sheng Xian

"Sometimes you feel so upset because of the conditions of your body... you feel pain, aches and discomfort... but when there are visitors visiting you, you have to put on a smile and show that you are appreciative of their presence" These are the words that I remembered from the previous official visit. So I hope that all of us will be able to spread and share the joy that we have, and make a difference to the life of the elderly and make them smile from their hearts:)

Kok Seng