Yo!
Decided to blog even though I did not attend visits for the past 2 weeks. Sorry about that! As much as I had wanted to go for visits, I had been bogged down by other stuff and by the people in green who may press button anytime, especially during the weekends, to summon me back to camp.
Yesterday, after being certain that I will not be called back to camp, I visited an elderly. Not just any elderly, but the most important elderly in my life: my Ah Ma. She lives in a terrace apartment in the Geylang area, near Old Airport Road, and near Kallang Bahru.
Ah Ma is the remaining grandparent I have. It was my first time visiting Ah Ma on my own, and I have not done so previously because of my complicated family background, and I'll only get to see her during special occasions. I met her on Wednesday night at a distant relative's wake, and I promised her I'll visit her on Saturday.
What made me make the trip to her home was that, well, I volunteer in the elderly sector with T.H.E.S, something is wrong if I don't visit my own grandmother, right? After all, my Ah Ma is living alone and she'll be happy to see her youngest grandkid visit her.
In addition, I held the fear of not being able to communicate with Ah Ma due to my weak native dialect: Fuzhou, as in Fuzhou fishballs. Truth to be told, my already weak Hokkien is better than my Fuzhou (I learnt more Hokkien in NUS than in army, and more Hokkien than psychology haha). But heck, I still have to try; I'd make mistakes and learn along the way.
This goondu grandkid walked from Dakota MRT to Ah Ma's place in a drizzle despite her telling him on the phone that it was raining heavily earlier on. When I reached, Ah Ma had to make an uncomfortable trip down the stairs to let me in. The conditions in and out of her home had prompted the elders to purchase an elderly-friendly HDB flat just beside Old Airport Road.
To my surprise, I didn't feel that afraid of speaking to Ah Ma after all. I tried my best to speak basic Fuzhou, occasionally mixing some Hokkien accidentally (they call it interference in psychology). I think Ah Ma already sort of given up forcing me to speak in Fuzhou since dunno when, so our conversations was a mix of Mandarin, Fuzhou and Hokkien hahaha. We talked about school, that filthy street of a red light district she's living in, and her new flat. I offered to help pack her stuff and move to her new flat. She asked about my mother. We watched people come and go at the balcony.
Apparently a lamp was not working in her house. Don't wanna go into details why it wasn't replaced by anyone but I offered to do it. Ah Ma passed me a new set of circular lamp, simple tools. I took the tall ladder and got working. When the lamp shone its brightest when Ah Ma switched it on after I have done my work, that feeling was wow. I have actually done something for my grandma for the first time in years.
There was another broken lamp. This time, like in a drama, I dropped the new lamp and it broke into pieces like my heart at that instant. I got a little too cocky and careless after my initial achievement. I felt really bad and I swept up the broken pieces. Really blamed myself for not being careful. Thankfully the lamp does not significantly light up the living room, and what matters is that I had fixed the more important lamp.
It was dinnertime soon, but Ah Ma made sure I drank water and kept offering to brew some hot milo for me which I refused because it was troublesome.
We watched the news together and talked about the Connecticut shooting incident. My aunt arrived as well with my cousin. We went to visit another relative and then we went for dinner together. We parted ways at the coffeeshop. That was how my visit ended.
***
After this visit, 感触良多(940's 口头禅). This was definitely more than just a normal visit, but it mirrors visits to Kallang Bahru in so many ways.
I am really, really glad I joined T.H.E. Seniors as a volunteer. I have learnt so much from our elderly and from my fellow volunteers, and I had so many defining moments. Thanks to T.H.E.S, I have learnt to overcome any fear associated with interacting and communicating with the elderly. I always hear from the participants that they would speak to our beneficiaries they way they would speak to their grandparents. For me, not sure if it's a good thing or bad thing, but it is the other way round haha. Nonetheless, it is a relief that I have finally took the initiative to visit my Ah Ma and keep her company on a Saturday evening, serving the role of a grandson.
To my fellow volunteers, you may have heard this countless times. *Treasure your loved ones.*
As a volunteer, I always ensure I move forward.
But as a grandson, I took a valuable first step.
-Jeremy
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